Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize