so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
