Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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