She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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