yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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