Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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