Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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