I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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