I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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