we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
