We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize