i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
