I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
