Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
