he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
