Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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