Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
