So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
so explain again why im purple
no
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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