East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
