can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
