Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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