nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
