oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Randomize
