He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize