Sponge bath it is.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I am available for nakedness
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize