Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
