I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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