I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
