I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
