Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
