i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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