i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
