In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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