I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
