Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
