i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize
