i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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