the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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