we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
