I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
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