This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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