What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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