There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
