Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
