i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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