no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
