My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Randomize