I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
