I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
organizing the empties. That sober.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
