The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
